


Whoopsie-Daisy

by coolshark



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Other, did i write it for drama, did i write this for puns, spaghetti was a mistake, undertale was also a mistake, who can say
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-30
Updated: 2016-07-30
Packaged: 2018-07-27 15:58:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,875
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7624852
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/coolshark/pseuds/coolshark
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Papyrus makes a mistake, and tries to get the help of someone he trusts very much to rectify it. Drama, puns, and horrible, horrible disasters of nature present.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Whoopsie-Daisy

**Author's Note:**

> what am i doing with my life

Without warning or any kind of notice at all, Papyrus burst through Undyne’s door, completely panicked. This in itself was not unusual. Often the skeleton was in one way or another bursting into Undyne’s house, more often than not going on wildly about how he’d seen a human when in reality it was a stick or a dog or Sans pretending to be a human.   
What was unusual this time, however, was the fact that he was cradling what seemed to be an unconscious Sans in his arms. This in itself wouldn’t be particularly odd either- Sans was able to sleep in the oddest places and thus his brother was forced to drag him from place to place like this- were it not for the outright look of panic on Papyrus’s face. 

_“UNDYNE! I need your help, please!”_ he begged as soon as he’d stepped through the door.

Undyne was on her feet immediately. No time at all to consider the still simmering tea on the table- though she did give it a fleeting, longing look as she stood up. She could have sworn that Papyrus’s soul was trying to leap out of his body, so distressed he was.

“What is it, what happened?” Undyne leapt forward, briefly allowing her mask of toughness to drop in favour of something far more worried than she’d like to admit.

 _“Me!”_ Papyrus wailed. “I’m the worst brother ever! I’m a murderer, Undyne!”

Undyne slapped him. His cheekbone was sharp against her hand, and she’d rarely seen Papyrus look more shocked, but at least the action did something of relief: shut him up.   
Undyne put her hands together and gingerly stepped forward, eyeing Sans with some trepidation. “You’re not a murderer. Now tell me what happened, and stay calm, or I swear to god I’ll suplex you on my kitchen table so hard you’ll need a new backbone. Got it?”

Papyrus nodded once, took a deep breath (Undyne found herself wondering how he could breathe without any lungs.), and said, “I was… I was showing Sans a new move I’d learned, there were a lot of bones, and I thought I was doing great, but…” His voice hitched. “One of the bones must have hit him- I must have aimed wrong. So I wasn’t doing great at all. I was doing the opposite of great. Horrible! The Horrible Papyrus.”

Undyne raised one of her fists in warning, and Papyrus hurriedly continued, “Sans must have gotten hit, and, well, you know how low his HP is! He just… He’s not doing great at all either.” He barely held back a sob. “He’s doing _horrible,_ and, Undyne…” His voice dropped to a whisper. “I think he’s _dying.”_  
Undyne grimaced. “Yeah, that’s not good. Here, let me see him.” She held out her arms. Papyrus, after a long moment’s hesitation, deposited Sans into her arms.

She scrutinized the smaller skeleton carefully.

Though apparently bulky in size, Sans was extremely light, even more so than most monsters. This, of course, was due to him being a skeleton. He couldn’t have weighed more than sixty pounds altogether, and Undyne was willing to believe that at least ten of those pounds was the hoodie that seemed to be glued to his backbone.

“Are you sure he’s not just asleep?” she asked, a skeptic edge to her tone.

Papyrus nodded. “Of course I’m sure, Undyne! Look!” He gestured to Sans’s head, where, near his eye socket, a small hairline crack was evident. “And then he fell down.” He clicked his teeth together in another effort not to cry. 

Undyne hefted Sans up a little, as if that would wake him up. Alas, he remained as limb as a sack of flour. She chewed on her lip. “Huh. You actually managed to hit him,” was her only comment.

“Can you help him?” Papyrus wrung his hands. “Please say you can, Undyne.”

Undyne shrugged helplessly. “I don’t know what the hell we could even _do._ Maybe Asgore…” Her eyes widened. “Oh! I know! Alphys! She could help him!”

“Doctor Alphys?” Papyrus stared for a moment, then jumped up and clapped his hands together. “Yes! She could save my brother! But can we get to Hotland in time?”

“Riverperson,” Undyne said, already making for the door. “They’re usually around.”

“How could I have forgotten the Riverperson?” Papyrus moaned, putting his hands over his eyes. “I- I’m a terrible brother not to remember that!”

He was nudged by Undyne on her way out the door and hesitantly followed, worried that even his mere presence might cause Sans’s condition to worsen.

“You’re not a terrible brother, Papyrus. God. You’re just stressed.” She half-expected him to stay behind, but was relieved to hear the sound of his feet on the hard ground after her. “Sans,” she muttered to the monster in her arms. “If you die I swear to god I’ll never forgive you. I’ll spread your dust on your fucking sock collection if you die.” She kept muttering threats like this under her breath until they reached he riverbank. 

The Riverperson was there. It was unclear how they just knew, but it was a well agreed-on fact in the Underground that they would always be there when they were needed. Undyne breathed a sigh of relief.

“Hello,” the Riverperson said in a soft voice. “Would you care for a ride in my boat?”

“Obviously,” Undyne growled when she stepped on. She would have liked to say something ruder were it not for the Riverperson’s rule that no one who was rude would get to ride. Papyrus stepped on after her and peered anxiously at Sans. 

“Where would you like to go?” the Riverperson asked.

“Hotland,” Undyne said. “Please,” she added a moment later.

“Then let’s go.”

The boat ride was quiet for the most part, save for the splash of water against wood, the occasional whimper from Papyrus, and the near-constant humming of the Riverperson. 

Undyne was certain that Sans mumbled something under his breath once or twice, but each time it was too quiet to be properly heard.  
“Tra la la,” the Riverperson eventually near-sang, then said, “Do you suppose children know more than they let on?”

Undyne ignored them. The only thing she could and did take from that was that they were at the halfway point between the Hotland stop and the Waterfall stop. Exactly halfway was always when the Riverperson would decide to say something. They were dependable like that.

In what was less time than it felt like, the little boat came to rest beside a gently-sloping riverbank. Papyrus wasted no time hopping off and Undyne was quick to follow him. 

“Thanks!” she called over her shoulder as she hurried up the bank. 

“Come again sometime,” she heard the Riverperson say softly. 

Undyne was quickly reminded why she didn’t like to spend much time in Hotland. Already the dry, scorching air was drying out her gills and burning the edges of her fins. She could feel all the moisture evaporating from her scales and made a note to drink as much water as possible as soon as possible.

Luckily, Alphys’s lab wasn’t too far from where the boat had docked, and it was no time at all before the two monsters- three counting the injured one- stood outside the door. 

Undyne, reaching it first, took the obvious course of action: she began kicking it as hard as she could. 

Papyrus just knocked politely, though still frantically.

A pattering of footsteps rushed towards the door, but the two monsters only stopped knocking- or in Undyne’s case, viciously kicking- when the door opened with a pneumatic hiss.

Alphys peered out nervously, her eyes widening upon seeing who it was. “Oh! Undyne! And, er. Papyrus.” Her eyes landed on the cargo in Undyne’s arms. “And… uh… Sans?” Her glasses were adjusted with one claw while the other worked at adjusting the collar of her lab coat. “W-what are you all-”

 _“Sans is hurt and you need to help him!”_ Papyrus blurted out, a desperate, strained note to his voice. _“Please, _Doctor Alphys,” he added in a hoarse whisper.__

__Alphys blinked. “Uh… what?”_ _

__Undyne frowned. “Sans got in an accident, got hurt, and now he needs help quick. Or he’ll die.”_ _

__As if in response, Sans groaned and mumbled something incoherent in Undyne’s arms._ _

__Alphys’s shoulders sagged. “Another one?”_ _

__That gave both Papyrus and Undyne reason to pause. In unison, they cocked their heads to the side and said, “Huh?”_ _

__Alphys, in turn, looked equally confused. “You… didn’t hear the announcement? They- Asgore- w-were asking for m-monsters that had… fallen down. For the soul experiments,” she squeaked._ _

__Undyne’s eyes lit up in recognition. “Right, those. That’s why I brought Sans, so you could help him. You’ve got experience with fallen monsters. Right? Except he didn’t fall down. He just got hurt.”_ _

__Alphys grimaced, hesitated, peered up at Sans with extreme trepidation… hesitated some more. “I- I don’t know,” she eventually said. “I haven’t w-worked with injured monsters, so- I don’t think I- I’m not that k-kind of doctor...” She caught the desperate, pleading look on Papyrus’s face. Alphys relented. “I c-could… try?”_ _

__The skeleton breathed a sigh of relief. “We have to hurry, then!” he declared as he led the way into the lab._ _

__Once Sans was situated on Alphys’ worktable (It had first had to be cleared of a few suspicious robot parts, which she refused to say anything about.), she took a moment to look him over, a single claw brushing gently over the cracked skull. “How did that happen?”_ _

__“Don’t ask,” Undyne said tiredly as Papyrus choked back another sob. She patted his shoulder, then punched it. Hard. At least it stopped him crying._ _

__“O-oh. Okay. Um.” She tapped a claw on the rim of her glasses in a quick, repetitive motion. “N-normally eating could restore someone’s HP a l-little, but, if it’s really a fatal blow, and if he’s unconscious, I don’t know…” She nudged Sans’s shoulder and he responded by mumbling something incoherent about steak._ _

__“There has to be _something,”_ Papyrus pleaded. He turned to Undyne. “Asgore could help, right? He’s the king!”_ _

__Undyne grimaced and shrugged helplessly._ _

__“Asgore! That’s it!”_ _

__The two of them gave Alphys a quizzical look._ _

__She was immediately reluctant, but nothing could hide the eager look in her eye.“There’s… there’s something that might work, but-”_ _

__“Then do it!”_ _

__“Papyrus, you have to listen,” she insisted. She chewed on her lip for a second before continuing, “I have something that m-might help him, b-but...it’s just as l-likely not to do _anything._ There’s a small chance it might even hurt him, a-and.” Her voice dropped to a near whisper. “Kill him faster.”_ _

__“Oh.” Papyrus spent a minute thinking it over. He put his hand over Sans’ limp one. His gaze darkened slightly. “If you don’t do it, Doctor Alphys, then my brother will definitely die, right?”_ _

__She nodded slowly. “I can’t think of any other way to help him. S-so. Probably. I”m sorry.”_ _

__“Because of me. The _terrible_ Papyrus.” Papyrus’ face darkened even more. He rubbed at his eyes. “Doctor Alphys, can’t you do it, even if it doesn’t work? If my brother dies- I don’t know what I’d do- I don’t deserve to be his brother.” _ _

__Alphys stared, bafflement and nerves evident on her face. “Y-you’re sure?”_ _

__“I have never been more sure of anything in my entire life,” he said with a determined nod._ _

__Alphys swallowed. “Um, okay. Okay, so. I’ll, uh, get the thing, a-and you two s-stay here, okay?” She shuffled to the conveyor belt, planted her scaly feet on it, and let it carry her to the lower level of the lab. A few moments later, the pneumatic hiss of a door echoed through the building as the door opened and closed._ _

__It felt as though silence reigned for as long as Asgore had, even though it couldn’t have been more than a few minutes since Alphys had left. The sound of Sans mumbling the occasional nonsense sentence and the sound of Undyne’s boots shifting on the floor were the only ones that stirred the air of the lab. Papyrus simply stood morosely at Sans’ side, his broken expression implying that he expected his brother to disintegrate into dust at any moment._ _

__Undyne scuffed the floor with her boot and ground her teeth. Eventually, just to break the silence, she told Papyrus, “You know he’s going to be alright.”_ _

__Somehow the skeleton’s frown grew even deeper. “No. I don’t. But- It has to work. I know it has to.”_ _

__Just as Undyne was thinking that Alphys couldn’t come back soon enough, the hiss of a door opening echoed through the lab, and moments later the scientist was riding the conveyor belt into the upper lab, a small metallic case cradled in her arms._ _

__The case was set next to the prone body of Sans. Alphys clicked it open with nimble claws._ _

__Inside, on a bed of dark velvet, gleamed three small syringes. They seemed to have been sculpted out of crystal rather than glass, save for the long, delicately pointed needle each of them was fitted with. What really drew the eye of the onlooker, however, was the startlingly red liquid that they contained._ _

__Papyrus furrowed his brow as his attention moved from Sans to his last gleaming ray of hope. “Is that… ketchup?”_ _

__Alphys stared. “What? No.” She adjusted her glasses. “This is… it’s…” She shrugged. “Soul… extract. I’ve been calling it ‘determination.’ Y’know- will to live? H-heh. It should give his a b-boost, and hopefully heal him, b-but, it hasn’t done m-much to the other, um, patients I’ve been g-giving it to. Yet.” She swallowed._ _

__Delicately, she plucked one of the syringes from the case and turned it over in her claws. She chewed on her lip as she looked down at Sans. Her expression gradually changed from nervous to just plain bewildered._ _

__“What’s the problem?” Already Undyne had summoned up a spear, despite knowing there were no enemies to fight. It made her feel better._ _

__Alphys flashed her a small, tight smile. “It’s just, uh…”_ _

__“Just, uh, what?”_ _

__She held up the syringe, a sheepish grin now on her snout. “It’s just… Th-this stuff has to be _injected,_ and Sans is, well, he’s a skeleton.”_ _

__Papyrus moaned and slumped the floor, much to the surprise of the others. “It should have been me,” he whimpered._ _

__Undyne promptly dropped her spear and knelt down to haul the skeleton to his feet. “Papy, no, it’s going to be fine, okay? Calm down.”_ _

__While Undyne stopped Papyrus from bursting into tears, again, Alphys spent her time poring over Sans. Every second counted, she knew, but she had little to no idea of how to inject anything into him without killing him. “Sternum? No...maybe if I- o-or if… the neck bones,” she decided with a firm nod. Those are h-hollow, right? It’ll hurt th-the least.  
And he should be able to absorb the, er, extract from there, so long as it’s in him.”_ _

__She looked to Papyrus to receive only a nod of affirmation before setting to work carefully sliding the point of the needle into one of the bones of Sans’ neck. When the skeleton didn’t immediately disintegrate into dust as the needle was inserted, she let out a breath she didn’t even know she’d been holding. Gently, Alphys began depressing the plunger, emptying the ruby-red contents._ _

__“This was so much easier with Greatest Dog,” she muttered under her breath._ _

__Once she was returning the needle to its case, Sans stirred and murmured something so faint it was hardly audible. Alphys craned her head to listen._ _

__At once Papyrus was on his feet and leaning over Sans eagerly, so close their skulls were within a hair’s breadth of touching. “Sans?” Even Undyne leaned forward a little, though she was frowning._ _

__“...Going to Grillby’s…” he was mumbling, and then, “Papyrus?”_ _

__“Sans! I’m here!” Papyrus cupped his brother’s face carefully in his hands and stared down at him. “What is it? Are you okay? Did it work?”_ _

__“I d-don’t th-” Alphys began, but Sans’ next poignant words made her point for her._ _

__“...You...want anything? Doesn’t have to be… nngh… greasy.”_ _

__Papyrus visibly sagged. Weakly he croaked, “Brother... stay determined.” Then, he stepped away gingerly and wrung his hands. “I don’t even _like_ Grillby’s,” he said miserably. _ _

__“It’s- it’s g-going to take a little l-longer than that to work,” Alphys said, adding in a dark whisper, “If it works at all.” She proceeded to busy herself with tucking the case under her worktable and otherwise straightening up the rather cluttered lab._ _

___Scff. Scff._ The next scuff of Undyne’s boot led her to kicking Papyrus in the leg. He, of course, immediately fell to the cold floor, clutching his shin. “Ow! What was that for!?”_ _

__Undyne’s shoulders lifted and fell in a shrug. “I wanted your attention.” She scratched her jaw for a moment, then offered the skeleton a grin. “I could tell you bad jokes while we wait for something to happen? If it’ll make you feel better anyway.”_ _

__Papyrus pushed himself up until he was sitting, his knees drawn up to his chest and his arms wrapped around them. “That won’t help,” he moaned. However, he did lift his head to meet her gaze expectantly. “But… if you think it would?”_ _

__It took Undyne a moment, but then she was eagerly nodded. “Right, gotcha.” She pushed up her imaginary sleeves in preparation, a move that almost got Papyrus to smile, and then told him, “I’ve got to warn you, my jokes are pretty crappy. But here goes: What did one ocean say-”_ _

__At that moment, Sans sat straight up with a wheeze, eye glowing, clutching his chest with one boney hand. Before anyone could stop him or even really comprehend what was going on, he threw up his hand and summoned a Gaster blaster, shooting a wild gaze around for some enemy or phantom._ _

__Alphys yelped and fell backwards, scared nearly out of her scales, while Undyne already had a spear in her hand, perfectly willing to fight the skeleton if need be._ _

__Papyrus, on the other hand, moved forwards rather than back. Then he stopped. “Sans?” he asked, more than a little uncertainty in his voice._ _

__Sans’ stare landed on him and he immediately froze. After a moment, the Gaster blaster faded back out of existence with a slight crackle. Slowly, the glow faded from his eye._ _

__Papyrus took another step forward and slowly held out his hand. “Sans, it’s me. Papyrus. Do you… feel alright, brother?”_ _

__Without shifting his gaze from Papyrus’ face for even the barest instant, Sans slowly reached out his hand and gingerly touched his brother’s. “P-Papyrus? You’re- alive?”_ _

__Papyrus pulled Sans into a hug, nearly sobbing. “Of course I’m alive! It’s you I’m worried about!” In a moment, he let go, but reluctantly, as though worried Sans would disintegrate if he lost contact._ _

__Sans did not, in fact, disintegrate. What he did do was settle back onto the work table with a sigh, and then carefully lower himself down until he was lying on it once more._ _

__“Papyrus…” he whispered faintly. He blinked. “I just had the weirdest dream. And, uh… mind telling me what I’m doing here? Hey Alphys,” he said to the scientist as she, now back on her feet, peered nervously at him._ _

__“Hi,” she squeaked._ _

__Papyrus’ delighted and slightly teary smile instantly faded. “Oh. I… You don’t remember?”_ _

__Sans’ nigh-perpetual grin faded slightly. “Remember what?”_ _

__The frown on Papyrus’s face grew even deeper now. “I was… I was showing you my new cool move, and it must have backfired or something, I don’t know, because the next thing I knew you were on the ground with a crack in your skull. I’m so sorry! Please forgive the terrible and pathetic Papyrus for ever doing such a horrible thing to his own brother. Even by accident.”_ _

__No one in the room could have been more shocked than Papyrus- and Alphys and Undyne both let out loud gasps- when Sans replied with “nah.”_ _

__“Wh- why not?”_ _

__“You’re not my brother.” Sans waited a moment for the even louder noises of shock to travel through the lab before he continued, “See, my brother’s called ‘the Great Papyrus.’ Not the terrible and miserable Papyrus or whatever it was you called yourself. My brother’s the _Great_ Papyrus. Heh.” His eyes flickered mischievously. “He’s gonna be a Royal Guard, he hates my jokes, and he’s the all-around best brother a guy could have. You seen him?”_ _

__“Seen him? Why, I _am_ him!” Papyrus took Sans by the shoulders and hefted him up a little. “Sans, it’s me, your brother! The Great Papyrus!”_ _

__“Well, I’m convinced. Good to see you, bro.” Sans shifted his gaze to the side. “Now, uh, would you mind putting me down? Just because I’m not dead doesn’t mean I’m not bone-tired.”_ _

__“You’re always tired,” Papyrus replied, maybe a little sulkily, before once more releasing his brother. Sans took the opportunity to lace his fingers behind his head, shut his eyes, and prepare himself for a nice long nap._ _

__“So what happened after I took the hit?” he said lazily._ _

__“Oh- I took you to Undyne to get help, since I didn’t know what to do, and she thought the great Doctor Alphys would know what to do, and she did! And you’re alive!”_ _

__“Huh. Cool.”_ _

__“Er… Sans?” Alphys began timidly._ _

__“Just a sec,” Sans said, then, “By the way, Papyrus, don’t beat yourself up over what happened. It was an honest mistake.”_ _

__“Well, I suppose, but-”_ _

__“I mean it, Paps,” Sans went on amicably. “Don’t _skull-k_ around just because there was an accident, y’know?”_ _

__“What.”_ _

__“Oh my god,” Undyne muttered. She hefted up her spear as if to throw it at he skeleton, but disapparated it before it could even leave her hand. She folded her arms and resigned  
herself to watching the show instead._ _

__“Besides, I’d say you really _knocked me out_ with that new move of yours.”_ _

__“Sans oh my god.”_ _

__“So what if you hurt me? I’d still say you’re a _chip_ off the old block.” _ _

___“Sans I thought we were having an emotional moment!”_ _ _

__“Are you saying my puns aren’t _cracking you up?”__ _

__Alphys chose that moment, just before Papyrus threatened murder, to step between the two of them. “U-um, excuse me, but… I,er, r-really need to give Sans a check-up right  
now, and, uh, he needs his rest too.”_ _

__“Don’t forget something to eat,” Sans offered. “I don’t know if I’ll have the stomach for it right now-” (Papyrus ground his teeth and muttered something about Sans plaguing his life with incessant puns.) “-but I’d still appreciate it if I could have a bite or two of something or other.”_ _

__At once Papyrus was animated and lively again. “You mean food? Like spaghetti? Sans, I could prepare you an irresistible meal! Of spaghetti! And Undyne could help! Right, Undyne?” He turned to fix his eyes imploringly on the fishy monster._ _

__A slow grin spread across her face. “Yeah, that’s a great plan. C’mon, Papyrus, Alphys keeps tons of food downstairs! _To the lab!”_ She grabbed his arm and practically dragged him to the lower part of the lab, the two of them excitedly discussing recipe ideas._ _

__“We’re… already in the lab.” Alphys helplessly watched them go. “Th-they do know I d-don’t _have_ spaghetti, right? Or a stove?”_ _

__“Maybe today’s the day the two of them finally learn to make something other than spaghetti,” Sans said laconically._ _

__Alphys allowed herself a tiny chuckle. “Yeah, maybe. Or maybe’s the day they burn down the lab.” Briefly a horrified expression flashed over her face, but then she chuckled, more forced this time, and blurted, “Anyway! How about that check-up?”_ _

__“Sounds good to me.”_ _

__“I d-don’t really know what I’m doing if I’m b-being honest,” she admitted as she traced curious claws over Sans’ smooth skull. “I’m not a-a medical doctor. Or a healer.”_ _

__“Fair enough.” Sans cracked open an eye to watch her. “Mind telling me what you did? If what Papyrus said is true, I really oughta be dust right now.”_ _

__Alphys swallowed. “Oh! Uh, I didn’t do anything m-m-much. I just gave you an injection of s-something I’ve been calling “determination.” I guess you could d-describe it as “the will to persist”? S-something like that.” She suddenly became fixated on straightening the cuffs of her sleeves. “It’s what makes the human souls p-persist after death, and I thought m-maybe it could help you? I was actually surprised it worked,” she confessed in a near-whisper. “It hasn’t done anything to the fallen m-monsters, but I thought that since they hadn’t died, maybe it was prolonging their lives a little? So I thought, maybe it could do the same for you, long enough to get you to a healer. But… I honestly didn’t expect this at all. Er…” She hesitated. “Could I maybe… um. S-see your soul? Just for a s-second! I just w-wanted to see what the determination did to it. If anything.”_ _

__She was greeted to a full minute of silence from Sans, and a worrying amount of noise from the other half of the lab. Alphys gulped. “Er… Sans? I’m s-sorry if-”_ _

__“No, it’s fine. I get it, I’d be curious too.” Despite that, he hesitated before sitting up and holding a hand in front of his ribcage. “Just… promise not to tell anyone, okay?”_ _

__“Um… why?”_ _

__Sans gave a shrug. “I don’t want Papyrus to worry. You have to promise before I show you, doc.”_ _

__Alphys took a deep breath and clenched her claws momentarily into fists. “Okay, I- I promise not to tell.”_ _

__“Thanks. Means a lot.” He opened his hand, closed one eye in concentration, and slowly, his soul bloomed into view. “Huh, that’s new,” Sans said._ _

__Alphys couldn’t help it- she gasped when she saw it. While it remained for the most part the shimmery white of the average monster soul, shocking, spidery webs of red ran through it, as though oozing through hairline cracks. The exact color of the determination Alphys had injected. The core of the soul, the very center of the skeleton’s being, was most curious- it was a bright, solid shade of blue._ _

__Sans let her look for a moment, then closed his hand into a fist, allowing the soul to fade back inside him. “Pretty cool, right?”_ _

__Alphys was at a loss for words. “I don’t- I can’t- I’ve never s-seen anything like it! How did it happen?”_ _

__“Well… I figure the red’s from the determination you gave me. And as for the blue... heh." He winked. “You gotta let me have some secrets, doc.”_ _

__Before Alphys could press him about it, Papyrus and Undyne came racing into the room, a steaming plate of something in Papyrus’ hands. He thrust it at Sans._ _

__“Sans, look! I made you something to eat!” he exclaimed._ _

__Sans gingerly took the plate and eyed it as if it was going to explode in his face. “Uh… what _is_ it?”_ _

__Papyrus held up a hand to give flourish to his next statement. “It’s spaghetti with a twist! The twist is! There is no actual spaghetti in the dish!”_ _

__Undyne, with her hands on her hips, had rarely looked so pleased with herself. “I didn’t think we’d be able to make spaghetti when I saw what Alphys had in her fridge, but then I thought hey, let’s improvise the hell out of this! So that’s what we did.”_ _

__Sans poked at something pale and vaguely reminiscent of pasta. “So those’re... instant noodles, right?”_ _

__Papyrus nodded proudly. “Boiled to perfection!” (“You could have just m-made _regular_ instant noodles,” Alphys muttered. “They’re really easy to make.”)_ _

__“And the sauce?” (“They even come with _f-flavor packets.”)__ _

__“That was tricky,” Papyrus mused. “We couldn’t find any vegetables , so-”_ _

__Undyne decided to butt in. “So we cooked together a bunch of ketchup, mustard, relish, mayo- basically every condiment we could find! Actually makes a half-decent sauce.” (“Did  
you know that I have pre-made spaghetti sauce in one of my cupboards? They m-make pre-made stuff for a r-reason- _so you don’t have to make it.”)__ _

__“Yeah, I’ll bet,” Sans said, giving the pseudo-spaghetti another experimental poke. “And I do love a good condiment. But I dunno, dude. I don’t think I can trust an ‘impasta’ like this.”_ _

___“Sans oh my god I’m going to kill you.”_ _ _

__“That’d be kinda harsh, Paps,” Sans said as he set the plate cautiously down on the table beside him. “Anyway, here’s what I was thinking. You, me, the doc, and Undyne all head over to our place and we sit back, relax, and watch some quality anime? I’m pretty sure we’ve still got a few disks lying around from the last time the doc came over.”_ _

__Alphys gulped. “Oh, I l-left them there? I’m sorry, I didn’t- but we could just watch it here, r-right? I mean, you probably should r-rest more, and there’s a big viewscreen here. I know it’s f-for monitoring the Underground, but…”_ _

__Sans gave her a look. “My brother and Undyne were just cooking in your, uh, kitchen. You sure you want to watch anime here?” Seeing that the scientist was suddenly looking very  
thoughtful about this, Sans continued, “Besides, there’s a couch at my place. In my opinion, couches beat big screens any day.”_ _

__“He’s right!” Papyrus piped up in an authoritative tone, “we do, in fact, have a couch! And. Well. We did, maybe, sort of mess up your kitchen.”_ _

__“It was only a little.” Undyne thought it over for a second. “Or a lot. But we can clean it up, no problem!”_ _

__She was nearly to the other half of the lab when Alphys held up her claws and shook her head frantically. _“No!_ I mean- no, y-you don’t have to. I can d-do it myself. It’s no problem. Heh.” She grinned weakly, already looking a little pale._ _

__“If you say so.” Undyne raised a dubious brow but let it lie at that._ _

__Sans leaned back with a sigh. “The doc’s right about one thing. I feel like a million bucks now, sure, thanks to her, but I’m really tired. Wanna carry me, Papyrus? Or Undyne? Whoever’s stronger.” His grin grew wider._ _

__As he’d expected, Undyne immediately took the challenge and grabbed him, tossing him over her shoulder. “Your weight means _nothing!”_ she informed the skeleton, with no small amount of triumph._ _

__“Well, I’m convinced.”_ _

__Papyrus put his hands on his hips. “Sans! You’re so lazy!”_ _

__“Doc’s orders, bro.”_ _

__Alphys clasped her hands together, an awed expression on her face. “I c-couldn’t lift Sans. You’re really strong, Undyne. I w-wonder if y-you could carry s-someone m-m-my  
size?” _ _

__Undyne grinned. “No sweat! See?” In one swift motion, Undyne hefted the lizard up so she was perched on Undyne’s other shoulder._ _

__Alphys blushed. She made a valiant attempt to say something, but suddenly found herself lacking the words for some strange reason. “Um, uh, I, uh-”_ _

___“Now let’s go watch some anime!”_ Despite both of the smaller monsters balancing precariously on her shoulders, Undyne wasted no time in racing out of the lab (Alphys actually flinched when she saw what Undyne and Papyrus had done to her kitchen area) and through the passages of Hotland in her beeline for Snowdin._ _

__Papyrus was hard on her heels. He wasn’t breaking a sweat, mostly because, as a skeleton, the heat didn’t bother him nearly as much as it would other non-fire monsters. He did slow, however, when he saw a flash of color from the corner of his eye socket. “...You go on ahead!” he said quickly, slowing his pace even more. “I’ll be… I’ll catch up, OK?”_ _

__“You got it!” Undyne shouted as she kept sprinting. (At least part of her hurriedness was in attempt to get out of Hotland as quickly as possible.) Sans waved to his brother as they moved out of sight._ _

__Papyrus quickly backtracked to where he’d seen the flash of yellow. Once he reached it, he started, then dropped to one knee to be closer to eye level with the being he’d sighted. “Oh! It _is_ you!”_ _

__“Howdy, Papyrus!” The golden flower turned its head up to smile pleasantly at him. “Y’know, I gotta say, I was really impressed with your moves back there!”  
Papyrus tilted his head to the side, furrowing his brow. “My… moves?”_ _

__The flower giggled. “You know, the moves you were showing your brother earlier? The ones _I_ helped you with? Those moves?”_ _

__Papyrus clapped his hands together. “Oh! Those moves! You _liked_ them?”_ _

___“Loved_ them! Boy, it really showed how strong you are!”_ _

__“Yes, well…” Papyrus’ face was downcast in an instant. “I don’t know if I’ll be using that move again. Sans got hurt, and he… Almost died.” He wrung his hands. “He’s fine now, but it still makes me feel, well. Really bad.”_ _

__The flower’s friendly grin didn’t waver. “That’s fair. But, if you ask me…” Its tone dropped to something a tad more conspiratorial. “I’d say I’m really impressed by what you did there.”_ _

__The skeleton frowned. “You don’t mean… hurting Sans?”_ _

__“That’s exactly what I mean.” The flower leaned forward as much as its stem would allow. “Do you know _anyone_ who’s managed to land a hit on that monster, even by accident? Nope! There’s not a one! Not even _I’d_ be able to do it! Well, not unless he was, say, heavily distracted by watching his ‘cool bro’ do a really cool attack or something.” It giggled again._ _

__Papyrus put a hand to his chin, his expression now more pensive than anything. “I suppose you’re right, but… it still doesn’t feel very good.”_ _

__“Well, I guess _you’re_ entitled to feeling how you want.” It ducked its head momentarily, as though shrugging, then once more turned bright eyes to Papyrus. “But I’d bet even Sans would congratulate you on landing a hit like that! Golly, he might even see if you could hit him on purpose! Who knows?”_ _

__“You… really think so?”_ _

__“Would a friend like me tell you otherwise?”_ _

__Papyrus took a second to think over. Then he brightened. “I guess not! Thank you, friend!”_ _

__The flower’s grin grew just a little bit wider. “Not a problem, Papyrus. Anyway, I just wanted to tell you just how proud I am of you for that move. Now don’t you have something better to do? Like watching some anime with those other friends of yours?”_ _

__At once Papyrus leaped to his feet. “Oh! You’re right. The great Papyrus can’t be late for that! Thank you again!” With that, he was racing off in the direction of Snowdin, now the very picture of cheer._ _

__The flower’s grin slowly faded as he watched him go. Then he groaned. “You know you’ve really hit rock bottom when your idea of ‘fun’ is trying to assassinate a skeleton,” Flowey grumbled with a deep sigh. Then, after a moment’s more of watching the skeleton dash away, he popped back underground. Maybe he’d go spy on his parents next. He hadn’t done that in a while._ _


End file.
